The Millennial Eatery: A Review of Avocado Toast & Irony
Has there ever been a more meticulously curated space for conspicuous consumption than Avocado & Irony?
Does every exposed brick wall in Brooklyn tell a story of gentrification, or is this one special, infused with the dreams of artisanal craftsmen who can’t afford to live here anymore? Why is every chair deliberately mismatched, and do the Edison bulbs really need to dangle this low? Is there a reason the succulents on every table look healthier than the patrons?
When you order the "Deconstructed Avocado Toast," are you supposed to feel enlightened by the experience of assembling your own meal?
Is this the true millennial quest—DIY dining in a restaurant where you’re paying someone else to give you the ingredients? Do the microgreens taste better when you sprinkle them yourself, or is this just another ploy to make us feel like we’re all culinary geniuses? And why, oh why, does every dish arrive on a wooden plank that appears to have been salvaged from an abandoned barn?
Is it possible to enjoy your cold brew without first photographing it against the backdrop of a distressed metal table?
Will your friends even believe you were here if it doesn’t appear on your Instagram story, complete with the obligatory heart-eye emoji and the hashtag #BrunchGoals? Does the waiter judge you when you ask for almond milk in your oat milk latte, or is this just part of the complex dance of dietary preferences that define our generation?
Why does the menu insist on listing the origins of every ingredient, down to the name of the chicken’s personal trainer?
Is the heritage of the grain bowl really that important, or are we just trying to justify spending $20 on something we could make at home for a fraction of the cost? When you order the "Quinoa & Kale Wonder Bowl," do you feel like you’re doing your part to save the planet, even though you drove here in an SUV?
Is the playlist intentionally ironic, or are they actually trying to make "retro" cool again by looping ’90s boy bands and indie pop that no one really liked the first time around?
And who decided that dining should be accompanied by the gentle hum of vinyl records, as if that somehow makes the food taste more authentic?
As you sip your organic kombucha and ponder the mysteries of the millennial palate, do you ever wonder if we’re all just playing a part in a carefully orchestrated performance? Will the avocado craze ever end, or will we one day look back on this era and laugh at our obsession with green fruit?
But maybe it’s not really about the avocado at all. In a world where everything feels uncertain, where the news cycle spins faster than a pour-over coffee drip, perhaps these rituals—the mismatched chairs, the heritage grains, the endless playlists of ironic pop—are just our way of finding a little bit of joy, a slice of stability in the chaos.
Maybe it’s about more than just what’s on the plate.
It’s about the connection, the shared experience of sitting down with friends, passing around wooden boards laden with artisanal everything, and knowing that, for a moment, we’re all in this together.
In ten years, when the next generation is mocking us for our food choices, maybe we’ll smile, remembering that it wasn’t really about the food.
It was about finding a way to connect, to create a sense of community, to share a laugh, and to enjoy something—anything—in a world that often feels out of our control. And if that means embracing avocado toast and deconstructed dishes, then so be it. Because in the end, it’s always been about finding connection, and that’s something that never goes out of style.
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